i’m a false introvert

a kid with a backpack on the mountains

i always thought i was an introvert. a very typical introvert.

someone that likes to be quiet. to have profound conversations.
who likes to read and stay at home. who has a big imagination, with much more bigger dreams.

but i’m discovering my b side. like the ones we find in old cassettes and vinyls. remember?

i always had a wild, adventurer side, though.

i would be the kid on the top of a tree. fearless.
i would be the girl playing with the boys, and getting bored when princess role-playing.

i would be the tom-boy, running, getting into fights, and finding myself dirty because of playing on the sand.

always on the street looking for trouble. always making new friends, and new conversations.

i was the girl who enjoyed to dance, and gaze at the stars.
i was the girl who enjoyed to sing out loud, and read very quietly. for hours.
i was the girl who wrote passionately. and had her knees hurt all the time.

i am a false introvert

because i also love being around people. the people i can connect at a deep level. the people i can be myself without fear. the people i can laugh until my stomach hurts. the people i can cry until my heart goes dry. the people that don’t mind if i’m being too quiet or too loud. the people i can dance with, or getting bored with.

but chit-chat people drains me. close minded people saddens me. and i tend to avoid straight lines and personalities.

i am a false introvert

because i was trapped in my own wall. one i built for protection and ultimately caused me harm.

gladly, it is made of glass. and they are throwing little stones at it. my walls are starting to break and i can see some light, and color. it’s beautiful!

if we pick what the world says about introversion, and apply some thought…

it’s easy to realize you weren’t born an introvert, nor you need to be one all your life. nor do you have to choose to be either an extra or an intra.

we tend to be one or the other, because it makes us comfortable. if you’re weird, like me, it’s easier to find solace on being quiet: you won’t stand out too much, and be criticized.

if you’re not weird and you fit in easily, then extroversion seems like the best tool for you.

it’s all about energy, right?

and energy can be changed. the hard part it’s to find the trigger.

by exploring my inner-child and starting dancing zumba, i’m reviving and reliving some old stories. i’m remembering how i used to be, before any conditioning.

and i was that girl i told you about up there. free, bold, wild.

now, no one would describe that way. they would say gentle, innocent, quiet.

but give me a few days.

i can be fierce, yet soft. i can be bountiful, and lovely. i can be peaceful, but rebellious.

and i will.

what are your own paradoxes? are you too a false introvert or, oh my!, a false extrovert?

«-,- { be magic, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

<<<333

if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. if you trip, let it make part of the dance. 💜

8 ways zumba is making me feel alive

girl dancing in open air

moving diaries // zumba nr. 2

if you haven’t read zumba nr. 1, go ahead and know what i’ve learned so far.

i’m still amazed how dancing releases my wild nature, my true self.

my husband says i don’t look like myself, because i’m more extroverted. more bossy: i do ask for what i want, with no apologies. with no excuses. with no holding backs.

and i replied: that doesn’t mean i’m not being myself. it just shows that people aren’t used to that side of my personality. that they don’t know my real self, because i was never able to reveal it.

and that’s kind of sexy.

i feel so free, so energized. so optimistic about the future.

zumba makes me feel like i can accomplish anything. that life is wonderful and magical.

that everything will work out.

zumba shows me this moment is perfect. even if i am not.

for that, i want to thank pedro carneiro – my instructor.

he is funny, sexy, a great dancer. i couldn’t ask for a better teacher.

the thing is he motivates you without saying a thing. he smiles and nods, and slows down just a little bit so we can get into the flow whenever we feel lost.

through him, i’m learning

zumba is a lot like life.

it can be unpredictable, because as soon you think you got the hang out of stuff. it goes and changes.

it can be vulnerable, as you need to work with your body, your mind, your feelings while showing yourself to other people.

it can be frustrating. you will make a lot of mistakes along the way, and even feel lost. and everyone will seem better at it than you are. but it also teaches you that each new step is an opportunity to change courses, to learn, to be better. and ultimately, to excel.

it can be revealing. you’re immersed in yourself and you have to deal with whatever comes to surface, without loosing focus. you’ll get to know how strong you are, and where do you need support.

it can be fun. you are there: enjoying the music, the movement, the rhythm, the body. and you are allowed to play and be silly.

it can be sensual. there are many ways to move your body, your hands, your belly, your booty. bodies are sexy, personalities are sexy. and don’t get fooled, your character will show up.

it can be tiring and energizing, at the same time. and you’ll think about giving up. and you’ll have the motivation to keep going, nonetheless. but it’s always good to have water running in your system, and a towel to tell you how sweaty, but awesome, you are.

it will be magical,

because you are magic. your body is magic, your spirit is magic. and your mind do wonders.

so…

«-,- { be magic, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

<<<333

if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. what is your favorite dance move? mine? this one.

p. p. s. dancing is another kind of flying, is it not?

10 real promises i made to my husband

happy couple

when people get married they usually share vows of eternal love, respect, and loyalty. until death do us part.

although i know i met my soulmate, i find those promises unrealistic. people aren’t perfect, we make mistakes. we aren’t always able to love, to forgive, to respect, or to be loyal. and we can grow in separate ways. death isn’t always the finish line.

i am aware of how harsh i can be. or how unconfident and touchy.

i am aware of how tired he can become. and overwhelmed. and lost.

so i made my own kind of vows, only promising what i can keep:

// i promise that i will fail, sometimes, in all my promises. because i love you in the human and imperfect way i am

// i promise that i will have a bad temper and bad days, and that i will do my best to not be as constant and exuberant as my good temper and good days

// i promise to disrespect you, to judge you unfairly, to be upset without reason, and to learn at each mistake and to compensate you with three times more respect, justice and contentment

// i promise to be distrustful, and jealously enough. so you can know how much i want you

// i promise to lead you to the extreme, so much in the good as in the bad. so you can be imperfect with me, and we could be gods together

// i promise to make you unhappy, so you can appreciate the many good moments we have

// i promise to question you, to throw you problems, surround you with doubts and like this we think about solutions, alternatives and different ways of thinking

// i promise to forget, here and there, about the promises i made. trusting you to remind me of them

// i promise that these promises are incomplete and will be subjected to changes in the future. very likely there will be added more promises and the old ones will be improved. because i am imperfect and also very forgetful!

// i promise to give you the worst and the best in me, and to embrace the worst and best in you. so we can involve ourselves in the most profound of who we are

i invite you to do the same towards your partner, or even yourself! and share in the comments:

what are your promises?

«-,- { be magic, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

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if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. i never married, but i choose every day to connect my soul to his.

it isn’t all about stuff

books, flowers and a cup of coffee on a table

// following my values as much as i question them. so i’m not trapped in my own mind, in my own box and can find alternatives and new ways of thinking, and new ways of doing and of living.

#12 of 17 mantras of simple living

simple living is often considered as the opposing view of materialism.

at the beginning of my journey, i agreed deeply with that way of looking at life: either you are a consumer or a creator.

but, i’m starting to realize that simple living is much more than that.

it’s about intention.

and intention isn’t only about our consuming habits.

intention is about doing things because you want to. you can be a consumer and a creator. you are a consumer and a creator.

simple living is also about enjoying the moment.

so not only you do the stuff you want, you also enjoy it the most you can. you’re there, in the moment.

in a simple life, you create room to what you enjoy. and you sit down with what you don’t. welcoming any feeling, any experience.

simple living is accepting what is.

sure, there are a lot more to it. like doing the best you can with what you have. not putting anything to waste – having a conscious behavior aligned with nature.

if we accept that we are nature, rather than a part of it, or a changing force on it, leading a simple life is as simple as it can be.

it’s you being deeply you.

what have your journey on a simple life taught you?

«-,- { be magic, } -‘-»

vector of a venetian mask

#themaskwriter

<<<333

if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

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p. s. i’m accepting guest-posts! would you like to write for #themaskwriter? send me a message or comment below.

why routines are killing you and what to do about it

before going to routines. let me tell you about what i discover today about death, life and sex.

have you heard about the death drive?

it is a psychoanalytic term to explain the desire of death. not per se, but a version of it that goes against the drive of pleasure, of creation and life.

it seems like death and sex are two sides of the same coin.

i will be digressing here, but although i always knew that sex was a mean of reproduction, and that reproduction meant creating something new. i always found hard to relate it to creativity.

weird that i haven’t made that connection before, isn’t it?

when i was studying reiki, and about the second chackra {that is related to passion, pleasure, sexuality and, yes, creativity} i always wondered why creativity was there. it seemed very out of place. as i related my creativity to my mind, my neurons and the appearance of new synapses.

i’m now re-descovering my sexual energy, my power as a female. {if you’d like to know how, i’d love to tell you on my bitsy letter. it doesn’t feel right to share them here. (;}

sex can be very vulnerable, very open.

we are a whole.

and it also can be very affirmative. and powerful.

kevin-lee-89432

sex is an art of surrendering to the other and a statement of your own self.

the death drive, being its counter-part, is a way of evasion. of conformism. of being diluted so we can fit in.

it’s a surrender nonetheless. the surrender of our uniqueness. it’s a statement nonetheless. of a fear. the fear of being different. the fear of not being accepted. the fear of not being loved.

it all comes down to love, isn’t it?

so we surround ourselves with routines.

as a creative person, immersing myself in routines is very boring. and i can’t really put my heart into it.

i don’t have routines. although they say that’s important to write and build a successful blog, and to create an habit.

i trust my intuition better.

for example, i like to do yoga early-ish in the morning. 7 a.m. more or less. but there are days, like today, which i don’t feel inspired to do more than a few movements.

and that’s ok. we don’t need to force ourselves to do anything. force is violence, which is death.

{well, actually violence comes from the latin word vis, that means vital force. but one that leads to destruction.}

instead,

we want flow.

i want flow.

but the thing about flow is that it’s full of surprises, of mysteries, of the unknown, of stepping on the dark.

we usually like to see where we’re heading, won’t a hole appear at our feet and we start seeing tiny doors and little bottles having who knows what and telling you to drink them.

yeah, wonderland.

without those pits and falls. we won’t have wonderlands.

with repetition we don’t get surprised. we can’t grasp the magic around us.

we don’t stop to see our idiosyncrasies, the witty moments of nature, the irony of life.

owl with funny face

the only thing on your to-do list should be:

remember to stop.

 

so today, add that to your calendar. as many times possible.

 

stop as you wake up and enjoy the sun beam on your face.

stop as you have your meal, and smell its nourishment.

stop and listen to that person talking to you, and look her in the eyes.

stop looking at your instagram feed. and observe what’s right in front of you.

stop and use your senses.

stop and open yourself to the surprises this universe has to offer you.

deal? good! (:

after you do that one thing of your to-do list, add another and pay it forward. if you want an idea, you can always share what secret garden you found. 💜

«-,- { keep the magic rolling, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

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if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. your soul knows everything already, let her be your guide.

the 4 best things a zumba class can teach you

moving diaries // zumba nr. 2

today i went to a zumba class.

it was my first work-out {if i don’t count yoga} in two decades. yes, two decades!

and i’ve learnt quite a few things about my body and my beliefs.

as i entered the room, i saw it was filled with mirrors, projecting my image front and back. fear appeared right away.

i became too self-aware of my weight, of my body shape, and of my lack of exercise / healthy routine.

it brought to the surface all the bad choices i’ve made through these last two years. and probably all my life as well. the sugar addiction, the lazy and slow movements.

i could see clearly how much my body was occupying space. both because of its size and the places it went {that it shouldn’t} when i was making a mistake. and hence occupying a place that should be, i mean, could be of someone else’s.

i felt like the stereotypical mother that starts to become lazy, fat, unpleasantly looking because she spends all day with her kid, at home.

the clothes i chose didn’t help me. they were too close to my skin. not giving it room to be.

at first, my sexy fat belly showed up. and i was always pulling my pants up. i was feeling more and more uncomfortable. more and more ashamed of my body. how it represented me.

then, i pulled them up for the last time, and laced them tightly. at least, there were no more falling stomachs.

at the second song, i was already feeling exhausted. only being able to follow the simplest of steps, and not having the energy to memorize the choreography.

i made mistake, after mistake.

going south, when i should go north. stepping once when i should step twice. using the wrong foot, turning to the wrong side.

but i didn’t get frustrated. even on being wrong i did something right: i never stopped.

being tired didn’t stop me. being wrong didn’t stop me. being ashamed didn’t stop me.

i did check the time several, well, times. wishing for all to end soon.

i was not getting the thrill i usually do when dancing. but i was purifying myself. releasing bad energies, so i could welcome new ones.

my tights were hurting so much, that i needed to focus on what i was doing rather than what i was feeling and thinking.

every time i did it, the choreography seemed a little easier. i wasn’t making so many mistakes. and i could enjoy the experience.

i wasn’t a victim. i was a warrior.

{this is the first time, and probably only, i make an exception, to use a violent word to describe my thoughts. as i don’t find any other suitable, and positive, synonym.}

every time i thought: when does this ends? i stayed with my emotions of tiredness, shame and discomfort. and i thanked for being able to experience and overcome them.

at the end of the practice, we did some stretches, some breathing and some relaxation movements. i breathed deeply. feeling safe again, feeling proud, feeling peaceful.

exercise is pure alchemy.

that is my a-ha moment. i never felt exercise, not even yoga, as today. and it’s not that i never tried zumba before. or aerobics. or basketball. or…

i knew that exercise is good for your health, like everyone does. that it leaves you happy as it removes the toxins of your body, while injecting you with serotonin.

but…

i never saw a shift on my energy before.

i realized that zumba had a strange effect on me. like i was high on drugs {although i never had drugs, so i can’t really compare}. i was more confident. more in touch with my wild nature {that i was dying to connect with, and to put on the outside world}.

i made jokes, like i haven’t done for years. i spoke my mind, like i never have the courage to do. i asked for what i wanted, like the deserving person i am.

maybe it isn’t only zumba that contributed to this transformation {which will only last for a few hours, until i get used to the dopamine and this new becoming self}. probably the freedom tribe course is playing a big deal, with all the journaling and meditation and the share of resources and experiences.

maybe what i’m reading, and listening, and seeing and applying to my life is creating new synapses, and finding their way to make me leave my chrysalis to become a beautiful, bodacious, and bountiful butterfly.

care to show me your wings as well?

«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

vector of a venetian mask

#themaskwriter

<<<333

if you liked this x, you'll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. when was your last epiphany and how did it happen? i’m obsessed with a-ha moments!

have you stopped today to just feel?

hand touching feet

IMG_20170608_074755

i woke up and prepared my semi-hot water with lemon juice, then went outside. i rolled out my mat, looked at the white sky, felt the pale light onto my skin and began my sun salutions.

taking deep breaths.

feeling peaceful.

feeling whole.

as i breathed in. and breathed out. as i stretched and contracted. as i was becoming more and more aware…

vintage cloudy sky

i realized

we take our senses for granted.

i was having such joy just for listening to the beautiful silence of birds chirping. of kids giggling on their way to school. of cars passing by.

i was so content by feeling my feet on the ground, and my arms reaching up the heavens. of my heart beating and telling me i was alive. of my lungs full and empty telling me i can be both.

i was feeling such magic by being there, at that moment. completely alone, yet completely connected.

hand touching feet

and i wondered how many times i stopped to enjoy my senses. because it’s through our senses that we experience, transform and are changed {by} the world.

the senses are what connects our spirits to the entities of our reality. to our material side.

what is the texture of your soul? your body.

what is the texture of your body? did you stop to feel it? to caress it? to love it?

mine is soft and warm. my little blonde hairs feel cozy. it makes me want to kiss my own skin.

what is your smell? what the back of your neck smells like? what smell has your breakfast?

i can’t possibly know how my neck smells like. but my breakfast smells like sweetness and earth and purity. lemon has a sweet smell for me, even a sweet taste!

IMG_20170608_074621

what are the tastes of your world? the sights? the temperatures? the weights? the itches, the pains?

today, take a bit of your time to experiment with your impressions of the world. how does it feel like on your body.

don’t take for granted the scene of a flower dancing to the wind. of your loved one laughing. of a soil gently nurtured by rain. of your cozy blanket. of the chills a breeze makes on your skin.

those are magical moments to treasure. savor them.

yolo. seize the day. carpe diem.

«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

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if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

~~~~

p. s. did this post brought you some joy? do you want to see me grow? please share the love with your friends!

p. p. s. i’m on instagram, like my photos @themaskwriter💜

when one action changes your whole life

girl doing yoga by the sea, with a bikini

today i wake up, drank my semi-hot lemon water and went outside to do yoga. i was there for 20 minutes or so.

it felt really good to be outside of the house, almost in total silence {it was 7 a.m.}. i felt my breath, my muscles, my body moving. the sun and the breeze caressing my skin. but i didn’t pay attention to my heart. if it was beating slowly. or fast. next time i need to do that.

i don’t remember having any strong thoughts, just things coming and going very lightly. they didn’t worry me, or left an emotion.

on our day-to-day activities, that’s rare. often our thoughts want to make an impression, and often we don’t give them attention enough to know where our feelings come from and why we’re feeling and reacting in a certain way.

i realized that i knew the exact time to finish my practice, and the exact exercises and movements to make. it was flowing. my intuition guided me. it was easy and simple.

when i came inside i sensed a shift on the energy. outside it was very light, inside somewhat more heavy.

my mouth was dry, so i was dehydrated. it was time to drink some more of the lemon water. i was also hungry so i needed to eat breakfast. i was going for the regular toast, but the great thing about connecting to your body and intuition is that you know right away what the best decision is for you. and it wasn’t toast.

my body craved for something healthy, nurturing. and that meant home-made apple jam with a bit of cinnamon. so yummy!

then i went to my computer, where i am now, to record my dreams of last night. and noticed my body becoming tense and earning for a fast pace. but i want a slow life, doing things with intention. which a fast pace wouldn’t let me.

as my heart was racing, i closed my eyes and took some deep breaths. it calmed me down.

just one decision: doing yoga, changed completely my morning, the way i feel and the way i act.

last night decision of loving my body was what put this all to motion. you see, i don’t like my belly very much because i am over my regular and desirable weight. i try to avoid looking at her, touching her.

but last night i chose to end that habit. i caressed my belly, telling her i love her, thanking her for giving me good moments. i felt her soft skin and also thanked for that. then i asked the universe to give me a plain belly by the time of august, so i can be confident going to the beach with my bikini. and enjoy my time there with my family, without being too self-aware of my imperfect body.

the universe answered.

being connected to myself is a wonderful feeling. it makes me abundant and i feel i am living the dream i wish to myself. it makes me feel loved, and with so much to give. it gives me hope and joy and purpose.

life is magical. we are magical. and i’m so grateful for being here, right now.

«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

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#themaskwriter

<<<333

if you liked this x, you’ll love my y.

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p. s. what is your y? tell me in the comments!

you are the whole world

after reading leo babauta’s newsletter {that you can also read here}, i realized how everyone in this world has contributed for something in my life.

thank you for existing. for providing me a more comfortable, enjoyable and fulfilling experience on this earth. without you, it wouldn’t be the same. 💜

whether it is the food i eat, the bed i’m sleeping in, the computer i’m working on. the emotions i feel, the thoughts i have, the beliefs i hold dear. you are there.

our realities are made of gazillions of little bits. and if you, and your work, and your energy is now also a part of me that means that i am too contributing to your world.

my energy is your energy.

that’s huge. it’s kind of scary. kind of overwhelming. kind of awesome. and totally magical, and beautiful, and inspiring.

and either we realize it or not, everything we put on this world will affect it in a positive or a negative way.

that’s why it is so important to live in the present moment. so we can connect to ourselves, so we can express our emotions and values and ambitions in a way that feels truthful. and right for us.

it is the only way to be kind. to vibrate at our best energy level. to be ourselves intentionally.

i know that most times you don’t realize this: but

being yourself is a big deal.

because it is on being yourself that you transform the world. people react to your actions, to your emotions, to your vibe. it’s a cycle.

being yourself is a big deal because you might be helping someone without realizing it. let me show you with a story.

last weekend me and my family went camping. we like to be close to nature, and away from technology, from time to time.

when we do that, we give ourselves the space to have meaningful conversations. because we have the time to go through the blabbery chat of every day life, and get to the deep stuff.

that’s how i realized that, unconsciously, i helped my husband during a difficult time. and i say unconsciously because i was only being myself: a loving wife that wants to support her soulmate, without judging him or forcing him to do things he doesn’t want to do. by not trying to change him, because she knew people only change when they desire to change.

it’s always better to lead by example.

and he changed in ways i couldn’t dream of. but that’s not the point. the point is:

when i knew that being myself was enough. {let me emphasize that.}

when i knew that being myself was enough, i felt joy, and peace. a big weight got off my shoulders. i felt free!

i guess i discovered a new kind of love. no, i know i discovered a new layer of what unconditional love means. because i felt it in every pore of my skin.

so, remember to enjoy your life, moment to moment. remember to live intentionally. remember to be, and to do the best you can: even if that means to suffer. it’s okay not to be okay.

you can’t vibrate high all the time, but you can always give your best.

remember that your energy affects you and the world. but don’t let that overwhelm you. because

being you is enough.

how will you love today?

tumblr_opl44oRFYE1u5lqbno1_500

«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

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if you like to be yourself, give me a thumbs up!

~~~~

p. s. do you know what you’re missing out by not subscribing to my bitsy letters? it’s time for you to find out!

you are not your gender

black and white photo of a group of friends hiking

once, i told a friend that i didn’t see my boyfriend as a man. she was kind of shocked and told me that she did see hers as a guy, definitively.

when i say that i don’t see my boyfriend as a boy, i mean that when i look at him i see a human, a person. someone with a soul that i want to connect with. when i look at people, i don’t really care about their gender. i don’t attribute their thoughts and feelings and actions as being masculine or feminine. {actually, i don’t put them into boxes: either religious, political, geographical, or other}

and i think that’s the problem of many anti-feminist people. or judgmental people in general.

and we loose a big part of ourselves by trying to fit the gender it was attributed to us. either female or male.

but this vision or gender is incomplete. it isn’t binary. it’s so diverse and complex and fluid that you can’t really put it into a box.

but, as i was saying: behaving inside a gender role is inhibitive, and may suppress some of our features. we can’t really be ourselves.

some man don’t share their feelings because that is considered feminine. they don’t want to loose their masculinity or be considered gay.

and some women act in a girly way {whatever that is}, because they don’t want to be seen as not feminine. that affects their confidence and ability of being sensual. believe me, i know.

being a woman or a man is enough to be a women or a man. no, let me put this in other way.

being you is enough.

you don’t need to choose if you are this or that. you can be both, or none. or something else.

i know that labels helps us to communicate, and to understand ourselves and to find our own tribe. but use them carefully. use them when it serves you, ditch it when it doesn’t.

as a woman {a tom-boy woman, if i am a bit more specific}, i don’t need to be hysterical. or to cry at every romantic movie. or even like romantic comedies. i don’t need to wear dresses, and make-up, and earrings or any other accessory. i don’t need to use high heels, or have a sweet voice, or to be a house-wife or to be a mother. i don’t need to blink my eyes several times or curl my hair on my finger. i don’t need to even have breasts or a vagina. among many other stereotypes.

in many ways, i correspond to the stereotype. but in many others, i don’t.

also to be a man you don’t need to have a strong voice and be depleted of feelings. you don’t need to be rude and violent. you don’t need to only like sports, and cars, and women. you don’t need to have a penis.

{i don’t talk here about other genders because i’m not familiar with them, but it’s a subject i’m interested in knowing more about!}

so, this makes me question: what does it mean to be a woman? and what does it mean to be a man?

what makes me a woman?

Being a woman is more than biology, and maybe it even goes beyond critically looking at gender as a social construct. Of course, there are a plethora of women (and men) who challenge me on this, and that’s fine, they’re entitled. But in my construction of reality, I choose to hold on to womanhood as sometimes similar but sometimes different from manhood. But with so many different representations of womanhood, who gets to decide what constitutes womanhood and what it means to be a woman? I think one of the unfortunate traits of human nature is that we feel a need to categorize people and this is evident in how we categorize women. We limit them and we say that she is, “that kind of woman,” and that kind of woman is categorized as one who is traditional or modern or a feminist or not a feminist or liberal or conservative or a virgin or a whore. The list goes on.

~ kovie biakolo via thought catalog

that is a very hard question because any of the characteristics that i may present can’t stand by themselves. it’s a set of features, that work together. and not every woman and man has the same set of features. we may have extra ones, and miss others.

i do believe that both man and woman have a feminine and a masculine side. there are feminine women and masculine men, as well masculine women and feminine men.

going back to: i think that the problem with anti-feminists is attributing only feminine features to women and only masculine features to men.

for example, i don’t have a feminine walk. i don’t shake my butt or put carefully one foot after the other. actually, i’m quite clumsy and i stumble a lot. my walk does not appear as confident and sexy. and it is also not powerful {power is always attributed to men, as if women can’t be it too!}. it’s just me, walking. #themaskwriter-style. (;

let’s see in what aspects can i be considered masculine. this is a hard exercise, but i invite you to do the same: i’m sure you’ll learn a lot about yourself and how you behave. and how that is attached to social constructs more that who you are at your core.

i do curse, sometimes. i think a lot about sex. and i don’t mind to burp  {as quietly as possible} in front of other people {i do always excuse myself after it, though}. i know it’s gross, but it’s also natural!

and my feminine side… well, i do like to dance and move my hips. i do curl my hair on my fingers. and i’m highly-sensitive.

it’s much more easier to tell you who i am, than to answer why am i a woman. even if i don’t know everything about me.

anyway, that question: what is a woman? or what is a man? is the wrong question.

the right question is: who are you and are you happy?

i rather tell you about my passions and my dreams and my fears. that is what makes me a human. woman or man, or whatever, who cares? i have someone who loves me and that i love back, that’s what matters to me and…

as i always say: as long as you’re being kind, the rest doesn’t matter.

what kind of human are you? i’d love to know you better! tell me one thing about you in the comments or send me a detailed email! 💜

gif of a woman and a man

«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

vector of a venetian mask

#themaskwriter

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if you liked this post, explore my thoughts on being a parent {and what they don’t tell you about it!}.

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p.s. did you know that for a long time it was hard for me to consider myself a girl? because my favourite games were climbing trees and getting dirt!