what they never tell you about being a parent

if you’re completely exhausted and don’t know how you’re going to keep up giving this much of yourself day after day, you’re probably a good parent.

~ bunmi laditan

nobody tells you how hard it is to be a parent.

they tell you about the joys. and the responsibilities. they even escape some fears. but they never tell you how hard it is.

there are days i ask myself if i am a good mother. or if i ever should have a kid to take care off.

some people aren’t meant to be parents. sometimes i feel like it isn’t for me either.

however, i can’t live without this guy anymore. he’s my everything.

i don’t know what i find most hard. it isn’t the responsibility itself of raising him. i kind of knew that i had to teach him everything. and by everything, i mean at least the basics.

but do you know how hard it is to teach how to pick a spoon or a pencil in the right way? or to hear him cry when you’re teaching him to fall asleep by himself? or to try not to pick him up when he falls, so he knows he is strong enough to take care of himself?

you need a high dose of patience. and persistence. and strength. and emotional control. and hope that he’s learning. because you don’t get to see what is going on inside his little brain and you only see results some weeks, or months after.

raising a kid is very similar to running a business. and i could do a post about it, but my message is much more powerful than that.

what i lack is patience. and maybe some emotional control.

i have good days, and bad days. and what makes me sad is that my son isn’t evolving at the pace i thought he would. {i think he is as smart, as he is lazy!}

in life, nothing goes by the rhythm we want. not our babies. not our businesses {or jobs}. not our relationships. and don’t let me say vacations.

i don’t know if it’s because of his rebellious personality or my lack of commitment. {maybe i should try harder?}

it hurts me badly to see his potential not being met. that is the hard part.

i need to let go.

let go my standards. let go all the judging. let go the boxes.

they never tell you how much you suffer for your kids. sometimes in advance. and how much you need to fight against yourself, so you can let them explore the world and boost their curiosity and marvel about the world.

that’s something i don’t want my little dents-de-lion to ever loose: looking to the world with awe.

it’s hard not to worry if he is accomplishing the goals you and society said he should accomplish at a certain age. and to find joy in every step he gives. and to be confident that yes, you are a good mother {or father, or both} and that you’re doing everything, the best you can.

and that it is enough if he is happy and healthy.

i’m a stay at home mother. and i used to feel bad about this label, because it meant i didn’t have a job.

but i do have a job. the most important job in this whole world: to raise a child that will be loving, confident and joyful. that will bring creative ideas to this world and do his part to turn it into a better place than how he found it.

i’m also a writer. but that is more a passion than a job. (;

if you are a parent and you think that sometimes you aren’t good enough, look at your child. if she is smiling you are doing more than enough.

give yourself a bit more credit and…

a gif of a hippo blowing a dandelion

«-,- { keep rocking, } -‘-»

vector of a venetian mask



if you liked this article, explore my other ramblings.


p. s. did you know that i believe in love at first sight?


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