body-shaming: it will always be your fault

ashley-graham

i’m a huge fan of lena dunham. she’s a role-model to me. so, it’s not surprising that i do have a google alert on her.

it’s because of that alert that my eyes were put in front of body-shaming. again. and how she “slams weight obsession”, as the media called it.

my body belongs to ME–at every phase, in every iteration, and whatever I’m doing with it

that quote up there is an excerpt of a caption on one of her insta photos. and i couldn’t agree more!

Thank you for this @Refinery29. I feel I’ve made it pretty clear over the years that I don’t give even the tiniest of shits what anyone else feels about my body. I’ve gone on red carpets in couture as a size 14. I’ve done sex scenes days after surgery, mottled with scars. I’ve accepted that my body is an ever changing organism, not a fixed entity- what goes up must come down and vice versa. I smile just as wide no matter my current size because I’m proud of what this body has seen and done and represented. Chronic illness sufferer. Body-shaming vigilante. Sexual assault survivor. Raging hottie. Just like all of YOU. Right now I’m struggling to control my endometriosis through a healthy diet and exercise. So my weight loss isn’t a triumph and it also isn’t some sign I’ve finally given in to the voices of trolls. Because my body belongs to ME–at every phase, in every iteration, and whatever I’m doing with it, I’m not handing in my feminist card to anyone. So thank you to my girl @ashleygraham for writing so gorgeously about this on @lennyletter (link in bio). Thank you to @tracyandersonmethod for teaching me that exercise has the power to counteract my pain and anxiety, and to @jennikonner for being my partner in FUCK IT. I refuse to celebrate these bullshit before-and-after pictures. Don’t we have infinitely more pressing news to attend to? So much love to all my web friends who demand that life be more than a daily weigh in, who know their merit has nothing to do with their size, who fight to be seen and heard and accepted. I love you- Lena

Uma publicação partilhada por Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) a Mar 16, 2017 às 3:11 PDT

it doesn’t matter if you’re fat, or skinny. if you use piercings or have tattoos. if you painted your hair blue and your skin red.

it’s your life.

you are in charge of your own decisions. no one: not your special someone, not your parents, not your friends, not your boss, or coworkers have a say on how you live your life.

as long as you’re kind, the rest doesn’t matter.

do you read lenny?

it’s lena’s newsletter, which gives voice to wonderful women.

this was ashley graham’s time. she is a plus sized model and posted one of her photos on insta. and the feedback was… huge.

Glam squad magic 💕

Uma publicação partilhada por A S H L E Y G R A H A M (@theashleygraham) a Jul 20, 2016 às 5:43 PDT

 

people were shaming her for not looking like a size 14, but skinnier than that. people were disappointed and looked down on her.

just because she showed her “good angle”, she was selling herself out.

come on people, really?! don’t you ever try to look more appealing? how is that different from putting some make-up and using filters?

When I post a photo from a “good angle,” I receive criticism for looking smaller and selling out. When I post photos showing my cellulite, stretch marks, and rolls, I’m accused of promoting obesity. The cycle of body-shaming needs to end. I’m over it.

~ ashley graham

in portugal we have a saying: arrested by having a dog, and arrested by not having it.

no matter what we do, we will be judged, and criticized. people don’t care about intentions anymore, they would judge a book by its cover without reading what’s inside. they only care about what they see.

time and time again, i read women bashing other women because of how they look like. hell, i don’t even have to read it on social media.

there are parents that say those things to their own children!

and it hurts. it makes us feel unworthy. like we are somewhat inferior because we don’t fit on societies’ standards. it makes us feel ugly. undeserving.

that no one would ever want us. either as an employer. or a lover. or a friend.

words are powerful, you know? they can either tear you apart or make you feel like you can do anything. so choose careful. choose love.

like i said on the comment: we are entitled to make our own decisions. and no one, and i mean NO ONE has the right to say it’s the wrong choice.

people have opinions, and they will have an opinion about everything. with social media, they won’t mind to share them loud and clear.

be you. and be kind.

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«-,- { keep writing, } -‘-»

#themaskwriter

~~~~

if you liked this post, you’ll love the one about the dove campaign: #mybeautymysay.

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